Fanfic Meme, Hetalia
by SiZodiac
Summary: Title says it all, so come in and have a laugh. It's less crackish than most fanfic memes tend to be because sometimes, all crack pairings need is a logical explanation.


_Disclaimer: In no way do I own Hetalia-Axis Powers._

_Hetalia fanfic meme._

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><p><strong>(Name twelve of your favorite Axis Powers Hetalia characters in any order)<strong>

1. Spain

2. Hungary

3. the Netherlands

4. N. Italy

5. Germania

6. Austria

7. Belgium

8. Bavaria

9. Prussia

10. Egypt

11. Germany

12. A. Egypt

(Bavaria is NOT an OC!)

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**1) Have you read a Five/Ten fic before?**

Germania/Egypt? Hell NO! That would be disastrous, not to mention a serious mess-up in world history!

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**2) Do you think Three is hot? How hot?**

I don't think the Netherlands is hot, he's COLD! And that's why I like him.

He looks somber even when he's obviously high on weed.

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**3) What would happen if Six got One pregnant?**

Austria got Spain pregnant? Though I seriously disdain Mpreg, I felt honor-bound to answer the question.

If such thing did happen, it would be during the Habsburg Monarchy. Nobody would be too surprised though since they were married at the time (apart from the fact that Spain is a MAN and yet somehow STILL managed to get PREGNANT!), thus I'm more for Spain finding a kid-nation in his land (in him) than actual physical pregnancy.

As for the parents? Austria would be a responsible but neglectful father (being the head of House was a lot of work), and Spain would be the complete opposite kind of mother (irresponsible and would spoil the kid, but he could make up for Austria's lack of attention).

Finally, it would be the Habsburg Empire instead of the Holy Roman Empire to chase after BOTH Italies and then screw history.

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Thankfully it's not the case.

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**4) Do you recall any good fics about Nine?**

Good fic about Prussia? A mountain of them I believe.

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There're a few I recommend that's ONLY about Prussia (that can be found on this site):

Good Day Good Evening by _Anti-Logic_

Bearing Witness by _Zalia Chimera_

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**5) Would Seven and Two make a good couple?**

Belgium/Hungary

Seriously what's wrong with this meme? There're only THREE female nations in the list, yet two of them somehow still managed to end up together.

Back to the question, would they make a good couple? Well yes, I suppose.

During the Habsburg Monarchy, Belgium pretty much served in Spain's house while Hungary stayed as Austria's maid. It's quite obvious that Hungary was the one who took care of N. Italy and Holy Roman Empire since clan daddy-Austria was always busy; and it wouldn't be a surprise that during the too many absences/voyages of clan mommy-Spain's to the New World, it would be Belgium who took care of S. Italy (since I don't believe the Netherlands cared about Spain enough to do that).

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Belgium/Hungary would be the shadow counterpart of the Spain/Austria pairing during that time.

Big happy family?

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**6) Four/Eight or Four/Nine?**

N. Italy/Bavaria or N. Italy/Prussia?

I have a good laugh out of this one and the answer would be BOTH AND NEITHER!

Because Bavaria and Prussia hate each other (in real life) with so much passion that I don't believe they would pass a chance solely to piss the other off. Hell, I believe many Bavarians still insult people up north as _Saupreißen_ (pig-Prussians) to this day!

So fighting over N. Italy? Definitely!

But they would both, more likely then not, be clocked by Germany before the day is out.

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**7) What would happen if Seven discovered Three and Eight in a secret relationship?**

What would happen if Belgium discovered the Netherlands and Bavaria in a secret relationship?

I'm just too lazy to look up if it's possible for the Netherlands and Bavaria to have a secret (or not so secret) relationship, though I highly doubt they do since they're so far away.

But if they actually DID, Belgium would probably be happy for her brother and glad to have him out of her hair for the while...until they had a falling out which I think common for countries to do.

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**8) Make a summary of at least twenty words for a Two/Six fic.**

Hungary/Austria

_Remember the time when he played and she danced, together. And now the wires are strung and the walls are up and the Cold War rages on, he and she on the different sides longing for the time passed when he played and she danced. Little do they know that he still play, only she can't hear; and that she still dance, just that he can't see...together._

Turns out better than I thought!

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**9) Is there such a thing as a Four/Ten romantic fluff story?**

N. Italy/Egypt, romantic fluff? No, at least I don't think so.

The story could probably take place when they were still little, with Rome and A. Egypt apparently having something romantic going on between them. But the fluff would always belong to the chibis.

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**10) Suggest a title for a One/Five Hurt/Comfort fic.**

Spain/Germania, Hurt/Comfort

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_Smile, Cheery Child of the Roman's_

Can't believe I actually thought of something that's not crackish and can maybe be done with historical accuracy.

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**11) What kind of plot would you use for a Three/Eleven fic?**

The Netherlands/Germany

_WW2._

_A bullet buried deep in the Netherlands' shoulder and when he looked up, he could see young Germany on the other side of the warzone, rifle raised with a stern look on his face. And the Netherlands couldn't help a sense of déjà vu washing over him as he remembered a time long ago during the end of the Eighty Years War, and the so young but so powerful child clashed with him on the battlefield, the child that was the Holy Roman Empire._

Damn. But I always feel I did better than originally intended when writing plot or summaries, and making crack pairings almost believable.

Too bad I'm not that good at writing actual stories.

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**12) Does anyone on your friend's list read Seven het? What about Nine slash?**

Belgium het?

I don't think so. None of my friends is a fan for het stories and sadly, many tend to ignore the female characters.

But I read the Netherlands/Belgium! One of my favorite!

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Prussia slash?

Definitely. One of them is a huge Russia/Prussia fan.

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**13)** **If you wrote a songfic about number Nine, what song would you choose?**

Prussia?

Berlin Wall by _Michael Frazier_

Where were you when the Berlin wall  
>came tumbling down<br>What did you feel  
>during the demise<br>Did you see the memories  
>forever stained with blood<br>of relatives whose dreams  
>were never realized<p>

It's a heavy price to pay for freedom  
>It's a heavy price to pay for peace<br>It's a heavy price to pay  
>when you have to fight for your release<p>

Did you hear the falling stone  
>like shiny marching boots<br>Pounding on the inside of your head  
>Did the tears of triumph<br>slide across your face  
>the wall of so much hatred finally dead<p>

All the massacres  
>and the concentration camps<br>Finally the wall is coming down  
>Faces full of wonder<br>hope and doubt  
>The lines were drawn<br>by faith and misery

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**14) If you wrote a Two/Three/Six fic, what would the warning be?**

It could be during the Austro-Hungarian Empire

Hungary/the Netherlands/Austria

_WARNING: voyeur!Netherlands, threesome_

The Netherlands accidently witness something after a meeting with the Dual Monarchy...and it soon leads to something more.

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It could be during the Habsburg Empire

Hungary/Austria/the Netherlands

_WARNING: unfaithful!Austria_

Hungary is just a maid in an improper affair with her lord. And since the Netherlands wants to piss Spain off, what better way to do that than take a leaf out of the daring maiden's book and seduce his master's husband as well?

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**15) What pick-up line might Eight use on Five?**

What pick-up line might Bavaria use on Germania?

"Dad! Let's wrestle naked!"

"..."

"I'm going to beat you, one day I will!"

Germanics really do such things in the old days...

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**16) Challenge: Write a drabblefic for Ten/Eight.**

Egypt/Bavaria

Can I refuse? For now?

I just don't like crack pairings unless I could at least make some sense in them, but I promise I'll write it if I actually manage to think of something up.

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**17) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?**

What would happen if Belgium walked in on Hungary and A. Egypt having sex?

What's with all the Female Slashes in the questions! And what's with Belgium discovering unlikely relationships!

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Belgium was shocked, _Hungary and...who was that beautiful woman that's with her?_ Belgium blinked, shook her head to clear her eyes...and wake up in her bed. (Because that's obvious a dream since I don't think Hungary and A. Egypt existed during the same time.)

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**18) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?**

N. Italy to de-flower...Spain?

I think no matter how hard I try, it's not going to happen.

But N. Italy could always ask his brother to help him and hopefully it wouldn't be turned the other way around. One thing for sure, Spain would have both Germany and Prussia to answer to afterwards...and maybe also ex-husband Austria and Hungary for corrupting someone they considered to be their kid.

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Won't be a pretty sight?

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**19) Does anyone on your friend's list read Seven slash? What about Three het?**

Belgium slash? I don't think so. Like I said, most of my friends tend to ignore the female characters.

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The Netherlands het?

Again, I don't think so.

But I do as mentioned above, I read the Netherlands/Belgium.

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**20) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?**

Write about Germany maybe, but only as a side-character because her favorite pairing is Russia/Prussia.

She did a Russia/Prussia/Germany fanfic once about the raise and fall of the Berlin Wall, it's pretty good but contains lots of rape and abuse...all in all it's a very painful story to read. Not to mention it clashes with my favorite pairings in so many different ways.

Oh yeah, and it's in Chinese.

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As for drawing Germany?

No, I'm the only one who can draw Hetalia characters in our little group.

I drew him once or twice, but the ones I draw most are Austria, Prussia, Bavaria (and now you can probably guess who's my favorite).

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**21) Would you write Two/Four/Five?**

Hungary/N. Italy/Germania?

No, just no. it's wrong on too many different levels.

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**22) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?**

What might Egypt scream at a moment of great passion? Beats me.

Probably nothing, but if I really have to take a guess...

MY RA!

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I have no idea where that comes from though.

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**23) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?**

Germania.

Months and months ago, there's not many well-written story of him. Sigh.

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**24) What is Six's super-secret kink?**

Austria's...?

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I think he have a very high endurance for kinky stuff if his partner wants them. (Off topic.)

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**25) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?**

Would Germany shag Prussia? To my horror, yes.

Usually when he's dead drunk, but sober when they were at war (WW2) and Germany was too stressed and needed some escapes from the sins he committed under order.

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**26) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?**

The Netherlands/Belgium

Usually the Netherlands, but Belgium might just surprise her brother every once in a while.

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**27) "One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Two." What title would you give this fic?**

Spain and Prussia are in a happy relationship until Prussia suddenly runs off with N. Italy. Spain, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Germany and a brief unhappy affair with A. Egypt, then follows the wise advice of Germania and finds true love with Hungary.

What the...I could understand the beginning then suddenly it completely derailed.

So the title would be _The World Derailed_.

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If I rewrite/alter it slightly for it to make more sense...

Spain and Prussia are in a _beneficial_ relationship until Prussia suddenly runs off _to pursuit_ N. Italy. Spain, _bored and rejected_, has a one-night stand with Germany _since he didn't find Prussia when he visit_ and a brief _casual_ affair with _France_, then follows the wise advice of _ex-husband __Austria_ and_ finds himself content with being with S. Italy._

Because we all know the Bad Touch Trio won't mind bedding each other, but I doubt that counts as any healthy or happy relationship and definitely nothing about love. And Prussia definitely did try to pursuit N. Italy, only he didn't succeed.

Then the title would be _Stay by Me_.

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**28) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?**

If Belgium and Bavaria was canon?

I'll be worried about my history test because I must've failed it. Not good.

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><p><em>Hope you have a good laugh out of it (I sure did), though I think it's less funny than other writers' fanfic meme.<br>__I blame it on my somewhat serious sense of humor._


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